COMMENTARY

WINTER 2018 COMMENTARY


APRIL 27, 2018

Ryan Galvin lied!  It turns out Eat-A-Bull was not scared at all.  In fact, they played like they had no worries whatsoever.  I'm not entirely convinced that they did not cheat, but without video evidence I have no other option than to congratulate these ladies and gentlemen on a well played Championship.  I look forward to beating them next season. 

It was yet another fun and exciting season.  I hope to see you all back for the Summer and Fall.  

SIGN UP FOR THE SUMMER LEAGUE NOW!!!  CLICK HERE FOR MORE INFORMATION

APRIL 19, 2018

Well that was a fun Tuesday.  I had a great time for about three hours, then not so much of a great time, then a great time again.  In the end, we have our Championship matchup: Just the Tips vs Eat-A-Bull.

In an exclusive interview with Eat-A-Bull's Ryan Galvin, we learned a little bit about his team:

Interviewer: Ryan, congrats on your win.  What are your thoughts on playing Just the Tips next week?

Galvin: Yikes! I don't want to play them.

Interviewer:  You do not sound very confident

Galvin:  I'm realistic.  We know our abilities.

Interviewer: What does your captain say about this?

Galvin:  He will say the right things to the media, but he's scared.  He won't tell you this, but he has nightmares from the last time we played (and lost to) Just the Tips.  I'm sure he'll have some sleepless nights this week.

Interviewer: Well thank you for your time.  

There you have it folks.  This exclusive interview proves that Eat-A-Bull is TERRIFIED about their upcoming Championship match.

APRIL 13, 2018

Ladies and Gentlemen, a new champion will be crowned this season.  Dee's dream of being a repeat champion came crashing to a halt Tuesday as Prestige Worldwide was not up to the task against All Jacked Up.  We now find ourselves down to the Final Four.  I expect a good turn out. Come cheer on your favorites and/or root against your enemies.  Either way, come out and show some support.

APRIL 5, 2018

Dear Dart Vaders, Playoffs started on Tuesday.  I'm not sure you knew.  It doesn't appear that anyone on the team showed up.  Better luck next year.  

The first round play-in game is over.  The party really cranks up this Tuesday.  Last year proved to us that no one is safe.  Everyone better be out there practicing!!!

Check the playoff bracket for matchups and locations.

MARCH 29, 2018

Hello Playoffs. Welcome back old friend.  Another regular season in the books.  Time flies when you're having a mildly entertaining time, amiright?  Playoff Bracket challenge!!!  Print out the playoff bracket, fill it out, and submit your entries on or before the play in game on Tuesday.  We will see if we can get a sponsor to donate a prize or two for the winner (get working on that Joel).  I wouldn't blame you all if you rode the #1 seed through the playoffs.  They are a hot team right now and I'm not sure anyone will be able to stop them.  I mean, did you see them on Tuesday?  Yikes, that's gotta hurt for the Morris crew.  There was no drunken monkeying around during this match (see what I did there).  But, be careful teams.  Lui's "back pain" may go away by the time they play next.  I'm sure a "healthy" Lui would have changed the outcome of Tuesday (lay off me. I'm just joking).

Good luck to everybody in the Playoffs.  Come out to watch the first match on Tuesday between Dart Digglers and Dart Vaders!  

MARCH 22, 2018

The Position Round is next.  It's the Playoffs before the Playoffs.  The last chance for those jockeying for position.  This is the most exciting week.  It was this week last season that vaulted the men and woman of Prestige Worldwide into a position that led them to a Championship run.  The time for missing an out in order to lower a handicap is over.  Its go time!

So I do a lot of pondering during my day.  I've even begun to carry a small notebook around with me just in case I find a particular musing worthy of a re-pondering later.  This week, I was particularly interested with the first Make-up week we've ever scheduled.  When we first discussed this, we had the idea of being able to cancel it and go straight into the position round.  In my memory, we've never had a problem with needing to make up so many matches.  Why would the board vote in such a week?  Then I took a look at the high scores for the week.  I believe that our lovely Angela Jarosky, who was proactive in the scheduling process, purposefully rescheduled a match just so she could make it on the league leader page.  She knew that he 16 and 17 averages were going to make the cut on a week that Sarah and Meghan were lighting things up.  Young Angelica selfishly used this loophole to insert herself among the league's best.  I'm sure she has already taken a screen shot of this "feat" and has shown all of her close, unknowing friends.  If you go to Facebook, she probably has already posted how the rest of the women in the league can't match her dart prowess.  I just want you to know, Angelina, that I'm on to you.  D'andre Klein, I'm thinking this may apply to you as well.

MARCH 15, 2018

I pick on Joel a lot.  This is mostly because I know he can take the abuse, but its also because he just gives me so much material to work with.  Allow me to take you back to 4 weeks ago.  A confident Joel proclaimed to me that the Shrimpin boys and girl were going to rally and finish the season in third place.  Now, this was no small feat.  To realize this goal, there were quite a few teams to overtake.  Nevertheless, Joel was sure that his team was up to the challenge. Lets now take a look at Tuesday night.  The pressure was on.  Joel and the boys needed to rack up the points to make that finish push in the standings.  Dart Digglers had battle inconsistent lineups all season.  Joel thought this was his chance.  So what did Joel do?  He focused all of his attention on the Jukebox and stopping the Piano Man.  Joel's team not only lost the chance at 3rd place, they may have found themselves in position for an opening round match away from home.  I hope the $45 worth of Eazy-E was worth it, loser.

We have at least two make up matches taking place this week.  Hopefully there will be 4, but I'm being realistic here.  The esteemed members of the board are currently deciding on forfeiture rules and awards.  I will update you once we have made a ruling.  

REMINDER:  IF YOU OWE ANY LEAGUE FEES, HURRY UP AND PAY!

MARCH 8, 2018 

Crunch time!!! There is not much time left if you want to make moves in the standings.  We saw last year how important the last couple weeks can be as Prestige Worldwide began their championship run.  It's go time for you sandbaggin sons-a-guns.  Every spot in the standings is up for grabs.

If anyone was wondering, Joel Littrell did stop crying eventually.

  ​MARCH 1, 2018

Dear Joel Littrell, QUIT CRYING.

FEBRUARY 22, 2018

Thank you all for the birthday wishes.  My darts were flying a little less straight by the end of the night and I take that as more of being loved and less as being sabotaged.

One very important note:  We do have a make up week incorporated in the schedule.  Any necessary make up matches throughout the year must be made up on or before that date.  It is encouraged that teams work together to make up any missed games prior to that week, but just remember we do have a catch up week built in.  If absolutely all efforts are exhausted and for some reason (should never happen) a match cannot be made up prior to the position round at the end of the regular season, the board will determine a formula for forfeit victories.  I can tell you with certainty right now, that no one will ever be given 19 points in a forfeit.  It is in your best interest to do everything you can to make up matches

FEBRUARY 15, 2018

I am a little disappointed that when I showed up to Double Play on Tuesday there was not a stack of cash collected by the league to pay for birthday drinks for our dear Meghan Kennedy.  You only turn 26 once (or ten times in Meghan's case) and I really expected you people to make this one a memorable one.  Let's not make this a habit.  As a dart family, we should take care of each other.  With that being said, we have another birthday coming on Tuesday the 20th.  I will give you some hints about who we are celebrating:  1. He is adored by all.  2. His dart ability is second to none.  3. He raises the overall attractiveness rating of the league by at least 4 points. Figure it out and buy him a beer on Tuesday. 

Week five was fun, wasn't it?  We had a lot of good shooting.  It looks like we are finally starting to figure this game out.  I am proud to announce that the boys on Shrimpin' finally earned a victory.  Let's talk about this for a second.  What was different this week that may have led to the sudden change in outcome?  Hmmmm... I know.  Dennis wasn't there.  Joel signs on these cocky steel tippers and they think that everyone will soon bow to their greatness.  Well, well, well, that doesn't appear to be the case here.  It will probably be smart to bench Mr. Schmitt next week too if Joel wants to even think about a victory over Just the Tips.

FEBRUARY 7, 2018

Kevin Yagoda is an angry man when he loses.  This is what I learned last night.  I want all of you to know that Kevin Yagoda does not lose well.  Years of practicing the art of losing has not helped.  This is not a warning or threat.  This is something you want to see.  Its wonderful.

In other news, Joel Littrell did a terrible job hiding Mike Maloney's trips pot tickets.  He had one job and he failed.  Thanks to Joel, the trips pot was cut by two-thirds.  Congrats, Mike!

Does anyone remember when I used to be good at this game?  I mean I was never going to join the pro tour, but I was ok.  I'm beginning to lose those precious memories.  It's been a while since I woke up on a Wednesday morning and said "Good job last night, big guy."  I'm telling you this because it would really help my self-esteem if I had a couple extra wins under my belt.  If any of you cared about me, you would tone down some of your competitive edge and miss an out every now and again.  Did I mention my birthday was coming up?  Thanks in advance.


FEBRUARY 1, 2018

Another exciting week is in the books.  more commentary to come tomorrow.

JANUARY 25, 2018

Week 2 was good I guess.  The reigning champs took a beating at the hands of Dart Vaders.  Dee Klein was heard after the loss saying, "I can't work with these people.  My back hurts."  Well, Dee's cries for help were answered.  Prestige Worldwide announced, just minutes after the heartbreaking loss, that they have signed Mario Arizzi to a one year deal.  Prestige Worldwide is hoping the addition helps their repeat chances.  Oh, I almost forgot... they also added Mike Maloney to the roster.  Good Luck people!

JANUARY 17, 2018

Week one is in the books.  Its exciting to see new names on the tops of the leader boards.

I was hoping for some animosity in the match up of the Coach's Corner servers, but they split their head to head and ended the night with smiles on their faces.  Much to civil for my liking.  I'm going to start some rumors to get the drama flowing a little in this league.  Did you hear that Angela told Tammy that Jessica was, like, 'the worst bartender in, like, ever'?  Here's hoping that kinda trash talk spews over into the playoffs.  

Lastly, can someone tell the Loepke/Galvin combination that this game is for fun?  Start missing some damn shots, please.

JANUARY 16, 2018

Do you remember Derek Jeter's final year?  Teams from around the league remembered his accomplishments by showering him with gifts and treating him with the respect he earned through his career.  I would like for you to treat me the same.  While I have yet to decided that this is my final year playing, you would feel awful if it was and you didn't get me anything.  I have expensive taste so don't be afraid to bring credit cards when you go shopping.  I highly doubt the cash in your pocket right now will have be enough to show me the proper respect.  Tax refund season is approaching so no excuses.  


JANUARY 12, 2018

Another season is just around the corner.  The Schedule is posted on the Document/Links page.  We have no new teams this season, but we are welcoming a good amount of new players.  Let's try to keep everything civil for the first couple of weeks for the benefit of the newbies.

One major change for this year is the formation of the the governing board that will handle all issues related to the league.  The board is made up of Ange Jaroski, Kim Kamradt, Joel Littrell, Brian Morris, and Joe Anderson.  If you have any concerns, reach out to Kim and Ange first!!! If your issue requires the full braintrust, Kim and Ange will bring it to our attention

The goal is to make every decision as impartial and unbiased as possible.  We want to do whatever we can to promote a fun evening for everyone with as little dart drama as possible.

I will see you all on Tueday... GOOD LUCK!!!


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